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Sally and Mrs. Hoyden

 

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In the dark, by the lake, in the moonlight stood a young woman on the verge of discovery. Or as a dude by the name of Trombone would say, "Sally about to get naked with a Senator's wife."


Sally and someone calling herself Mrs. Hoyden had met in a chat room where lesbians, bisexuals, or people pretending to be such engage in everything from small talk to graphic sexual descriptions. In chat, both Sally and Mrs. Hoyden proclaimed to prefer men. Still, their chat revealed thoughts of what in their mind seemed a forbidden love that intrigued them. Both had teased with other people to consider an actual meeting but without actually doing it. Perhaps it was the number of people they both had let down and were now ignored by that eventually caused them to end up chatting with each other more than anyone else. Then again, perhaps there was some other reason Sally found herself chatting with Mrs. Hoyden a lot more than with other people.


Sally looked out over the moonlit lake. She couldn't believe she had actually driven up to where Hoy had suggested they meet. She was so scared during the drive she practically shook the entire way. Now she hoped that Hoy had more sense and had decided to back out. Then Sally heard the sound of a car coming toward her on the narrow dirt road. Sally turned and saw the bright headlights as the car came to a stop. Then she heard the car door open and close.


"Mrs. Hoyden, is that you?"


There was no answer. There was just the sound of footsteps and some slight, heavy breathing. Then Sally felt a hand on the cheek of her face. The hand felt larger than she had imagined.


Sally backed away as she tried to focus more clearly on the shadowy figure. "Mrs. Hoyden?"


A whispering, raspy voice breathed a reply, "I've got laryngitis. This normally only happens when I've a speaking engagement that frightens me."


Sally said, "I'm also nervous. Let's forget this silliness."


Sally felt lips press against her lips and then the shadowy figured took a step back and said, "If that is what you want." Then the shadowy figure of a person stepped forward and Sally felt a hand on her breast. "I'd like to touch your naked breast." Sally stood still and said nothing as she felt her sweater being lifted up and a hand move under her brazier. "Your nipple is nice and firm. I'm going to lick your breast."


Sally reached up and with one hand took hold of the person by the collar of their shirt and then with her other hand grabbed their crotch. "Yeah, that is what I thought. You are a dude."


"Spoiled all my fun."


Sally now recognized the voice. "Trombone, you are Mrs. Hoyden."


"And I was going to give you the best lesbian sex of your life."


Sally asked, "You don't mind that I was going to cheat on you?"


"At first but then I really got into this Lesbian role playing we were doing. Then you had to go spoil it. I was going to give you the best oral sex of your life."


"You lousy at that as a man. I doubt you'd much improve pretending to be a woman."


"Now you will never know."


"You came here to pretend to be a woman. You wearing women's clothes?"


"Hell no. In this lesbian relationship I am the hoyden. I am the tomboy."


"Yeah, well, when we are married I am going to be the man."


"Married? It is true what they say. Turning Internet fantasy into real time is a dangerous game." Trombone laughed, "Girl, you are scaring me."


"Good! You played me for a fool. But now there is something that I want to ask you."


"Don't bother getting down on your knees to propose. I'm not ready for marriage."


"No, not that. Nothing to discuss there. You are going to marry me. I'm just curious."


"Obviously, or you wouldn't have come here."


"What I am curious about is that as Mrs. Hoyden you said you prefer men?"


"I also said that I am a woman but now if you want to pretend you are a man I will prefer you."


"Cool." Smiling, Sally added as she put Trombone's arm around her and cuddled close to him, "I do hope you know that I will never consider cheating on you again."


"And I will never cheat on you. Let's do get married."


Then a couple of people who were having sex in the bushes and who had been listening to them yelled out, "Marriage! Get out of here you perverts."








 
My Funny Valentine

 
Reviewer: A reader from Atlanta, GA United States MY FUNNY VALENTINE presents three heart-warming stories to bring a smile, or perhaps a tear, to the holiday. Authors Peggy Daniels, Allison Knight and Deborah Matthews bring their lovely talent together in this trio of treats certain to sweeten the approaching holiday.

CAN I CALL YOU SWEEETHEART? By Peggy Daniels: Four years ago Nicholas Parish left to fight in the Civil War, practically leaving Amber Wade at the altar on Valentine's Day. Now he returns to learn that his sweetheart married his brother and has a son. A tender, evocative tale certain to pluck the heartstrings, CAN I CALL YOU SWEETHEART copes with the pain of abandonment and the sweetness of learning to trust.

WINTER ROSES by Allison Knight: Gavin Sinclair is determined to thwart his younger brother's plans for elopement after the Valentine's ball. He thinks he's kidnapped the bride, but he really has the bride's older sister. WINTER ROSES is a charming regency romance that deftly breaks the rules of society in the most delightful manner.

BE MINE by Deborah Matthews: The Earl of Valentine curses the fool that gave his family their name. Even worse, his Aunt Cupid capitalizes upon her name by bringing lonely hearts together. Val makes a wager with his cousin that he can escape the marriage altar, but finds himself struck by Cupid's arrow aimed from an unlikely direction. A delectable, playful treat, BE MINE brings a comic chuckle to this collection. Evocative, endearing, and tender, this collection is highly recommended.



 
Substitute for Love

 
Reviewer: blondiechick

I didn't read this book until it showed up as a Lammy finalist. I've never been much of a romance fan because it's all a formula with girl-next-door characters. The sex fades to black before anything really interesting happens. Karin Kallmaker seems to have no idea what a romance is supposed to be! She dares to defy the romance formula by delaying the actual meeting of the characters until nearly three-quarters of the way through the book. Then she has the audacity to spend an entire chapter on every sensation, nuance and climax that results when the two women finally do meet. Not satisfied with that, she also spends way, way too much time developing her primary and secondary characters, giving them whole lives with real jobs and inescapable pressures. Reyna is hardly girl-next-door material, not with the bike, the secret life and a job doing research on behalf of anti-gay groups. Holly -- well, I can't even think of any other female mathematician in any lesbian-written literature. Again, not the girl-next-door at all. Someone tell this woman she's writing terrible "romances!" I notice in another review a suggestion that this book has nothing but bad male characters. Sure the boyfriend and father are only slightly redeemed by the end of the story, but there is a teacher and private detective who are both genuinely decent. The portrait of the "cured" gay man was heartbreaking. I may be hooked on these terrible "romances" from now on. How shall I ever tell my friends?!



 
Curious Wine: A Novel

 
Reviewer: L. Kidd from Herndon, VA United States After all these years I still find "Curious Wine" to be my favorite lesbian novel. The characters have depth, are realistic, do not just jump all over each other, make rational decisions... Unlike too many lesbian books out there now with no character depth, no plot, no anything... I highly recommended "Curious Wine" and "An Emergence of Green" from Katherine Forrest. My only angst here lies in the fact that all the other books Katherine has written are mysteries based on the same character. I honestly don't know why there are so many lesbian mystery books out there... :P


 
Fogs in August

 
Reviewer: gracl1920 from Chicago This story took me by surprise. I thought I was reading someone's journey of self-discovery -- coming out of the closet in Mainstreet, U.S.A. But suddenly it morphed into Nightmare on Elm Street. I had a hard time assimilating the twists and turns of genre this story took. I thought maybe someone had sewn the wrong pages into my book. But, hey, I'm not the author and I don't get to make up the story. So even though things got a little too tense for this faint heart, when all was said and done, there was no doubt that this is a very talented writer, original and wonderfully descriptive. She elicited every emotion in my repetoire and, darn, if she didn't keep me up way past my bedtime because there was no way I could put this book down before I reached the last page. I am definitely looking forward to her next book
Video


 
A Guide to the G Spot & Extreme Multiple Orgasms (2001)

 
Description A whole new generation is discovering the G spot and the EXTREME multiple orgasms G spot stimulation delivers; yet many people doubt the existence of the G Spot. Is there a G Spot? Have you found yours/your partners? Have you ever found it by accident and NOT been able to re-produce the sensation? What are multiple orgasms? How soon after each other do they have to be, to count as multiple orgasm? How many orgasms occur during the average G Spot orgasm? What does a G Spot orgasm feel like? Can women reach the G spot themselves? Where is the darn G Spot? And how can I get there? All these questions are answered in the new video release; “A Guide to the G SPOT and EXTREME MULTIPLE ORGASMS”


 
What Women Want (2000)

 
Reviewer: A reader from LA, CA The sexual technique video "What Women Want" reveals what women really want from their partners in bed and beyond. The video uses sexual experienced women to reveal what they want in a man and what they want in their sex lives. The attractive couples in this video show you how to fulfill a woman's intimate wishes such as: · What is really attractive in a man. · How to elicit the deeper emotion · Sexual technique that works every time · How to express passion · Adventurous sex The following is Shopinprivate.com's review of the What Men Want video. Educational Value: Very Good. This video covers a number of techniques that discuss what women want. Although the video makes some generalizations many of the techniques are universal and none of them are wrong. Every man can benefit from this video. Nudity: This video depicts nudity. It shows and discusses couples engaging in oral sex and sexual intercourse. Each technique is describe and shown in explicit detail. Suitability For Couples: This video is suitable for more adventurous couples. Production Quality: This video is well composed and edited. It is approximately 60 minutes long and includes a number of examples. Overall Comments: This video would be a nice addition to your library if you are interested in improving the sexual experiences of your female partner.